Emiliano, a man who had made the gender transition to become a woman, lived five years being Milena, until she decided she didn’t want to be anymoredue to social pressures.
In an interview for ‘Infobae’, the 24-year-old Argentine recounted how he had to go through his gender ‘detransition’, a process that trans people go through to return to their birth gender.
Born in Mar del Plata, Argentina, Emiliano knew from the beginning that his life was full of contrasts, as he loved playing with dolls and dressing in pink, but also having fun with remote control cars and video game consoles.
I cried a lot because I gave everything but it wasn’t enough
At 14 years he declared himself bisexual to his family, however, at 17 he discovered that he did not really like girlsso he revealed that he was gay.
His sexual orientation, that is, his attraction to a person, was already defined, however, his gender identity, the way he saw himself, still seemed to be a mystery.
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He began his path in the world of drag after having dressed as a woman at a costume party. She liked her montage so much that she nicknamed it Milena. He put heels, glitter and tight clothes on her, finding in her a refuge that made him increase her confidence and love of her own.
“Milena started out as a character but I immediately found an empowerment that I had never felt before.. I felt strong, powerful, I did not love myself as much as a man, but when I became Milena, he loved me, “said Emiliano for the aforementioned media.
For 2016, Emilian decided to gather all of her clothing culturally associated with the male gender and begin her transition journeya process in which he intended to change his presentation to match how he felt inside.
She had prostheses implanted to have breasts, she had extensions placed, she filled her lips with hyaluronic acid, she wore underwear that fitted her genitals, and she changed the gender on her identity documents. Thus, finally, Milena was born.
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In order to pay for her surgeries, Milena decided to be an ‘escort’. Having sex with straight men for money helped her scrape together an apartment and the cost of maintaining her lifestyle as a woman.
“That’s the way a straight guy can have sex with a trans girl. By paying, she makes sure that she will not call him again, that there will be no sentimental bond, ”she assured.
After five years of being a woman, Emiliano began to notice that perhaps “it would never be enough”, that no matter how many cosmetic procedures she underwent, they would continue to treat her like a man wherever she went.
Suddenly squeezing his genitals all the time, injecting himself and walking in high heels didn’t seem like a reality he could sustain for much longer. so he made the decision, much to his regret, to begin the ‘detransition’ of gender.
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“I cried a lot because I gave everything but it was not enough: they never stopped treating me badly, they never stopped treating me like a man when entering a business. It was very frustrating to realize that even if I put on Angelina Jolie’s face it wasn’t going to cut it either,” she said.
And although there were many fears involved, Emiliano slowly returned to being himself, a 24-year-old man who has gone through a whole story to discover himself.
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