From a certain age, being single is often perceived as a stigma. Many women are happy alone. “Self-partnered” is the new trend.
the essentials in brief
- The term “self-partnered” was coined by the actress Emma Watson.
- It means being in a relationship with yourself.
- According to studies, single women are happier than women in partnerships.
There is hardly a single woman over 30 who does not know this reaction: Weird and pitying looks from women in partnership and marriage, missing invitations from friends and questions from older relatives about when a wedding is to be expected.
Self-partnered and single-positive
More and more women today are defending themselves against the unjustified stigma of the old maid who lives alone with ten cats. They are comfortable singles and know that their happiness doesn’t necessarily depend on a man.
Buzz words such as “Single-Positive” and “Self-Partnered” spill into German-speaking countries from the English-speaking world.
The latter was coined by Emma Watson, who became a young star as the precocious Hermione Granger in the eight Harry Potter films. In recent years she has made less of an impact as an actress and more as a feminist and UN ambassador.
In an interview with Vogue, she admitted that shortly before her 30th birthday she felt more and more subtle pressure because she was single and could not come up with a husband, wedding plans and the desire to have children.
Until she found the courage to say she was her own partner: Self-partnered.
I’m going to eat with myself
For some women, going alone to a restaurant or cinema is still the maximum penalty. You feel stared at and instantly condemned as a wallflower.
Not so the modern independent woman. She goes to the cinema simply because she wants to see a certain film and to the restaurant because she wants to spoil herself with a delicious meal.
As singles, other women discover new hobbies for which there was no time in the partnership. They start practicing yoga, buy a racing bike or join a tennis club.
Sinkies (single income, no kids) come together in metropolises like London. They are independent women who meet like-minded people for various activities such as hiking and board games.
Singles live happier
Several studies have already shown that single life is good for most women.
The English behavior researcher Paul Dolan found in his book “Happy Ever After” that childless single women were the happiest of the four groups examined. The other groups were married women, married men, and single men.
A comparable study by the University of California among long-term singles revealed a similar result.
Above all, she found that singles were more open to new things and more flexible and could fall back on a larger network of friends and relatives.
How do I learn to be satisfied with myself?
Whoever wants to follow Emma Watson and go through life self-partnered, above all needs a thick skin and patience. Even if studies refute the image of the unhappy single woman, the cliché persists in the media.
Single women in film and television still seem to be preoccupied with finding a partner. According to surveys, the reality is different.
In a poll for the Single Lifestyles UK Report, only 25 percent of female singles said they had actively sought a partner in the past year. 75 percent, on the other hand, were happy with themselves.
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